That typically means a clergy member will join the couple in the eyes of the law.
But American participation in organized religion has beentrending downwardsince the 1970s.
This solution doesnt just save you awkwardness.
Getty Images
It can alsosave you cold, hard cashby eliminating the wedding day officiant fee.
What is Self-Uniting Marriage?
Ironically, the way to get married without an officiant was paved by religious tradition.
Self-uniting marriage is a Quaker tradition stemming from a belief that every person has equal access to God.
Because there is no need for clergy mediation, you wont find an officiant at a Quaker wedding ceremony.
Rather than having a clergy member marry the couple, the couple itself officiates the ceremony.
Religious freedom is an important part of American ethos.
No Interest Til Almost 2027?
Im Not a Quaker.
You may be wondering how all this is helpful to you.
You probably arent Quaker yourself.
You may or may not believe in God at all.
Can you even legally conduct a self-uniting marriage if youre not Quaker?
The answer is, Yes.
At least in some states.
It wasnt always so clear, though.
They were asked about their religion, and they told the truth.
Because of their answer, they were denied a marriage license.
Did you know?
A U.S. district judge ruled that the ACLU was right.
This same logic has been adopted by most states that allow self-uniting marriage.
Which States Allow Self-Uniting Marriages?
There are only a handful of states that have self-solemnization written into their laws.
And each state manages the practice slightly differently.
Maine and Nevada allow self-uniting marriages, but only for specific faith groups.
In Maine, you must be a member of the Quaker or Bahai faiths.
In Nevada, the only allowances to the traditional officiant route are for Quakers and American Indians.
However, in all other states that allow self-uniting marriages, theres more leeway.
California
Self-uniting marriage often goes by the term non-clergy wedding in the state of California.
Colorado
In Colorado, anyone can seek out a self-solemnizing marriage license.
Colorado is also one of the only places where couples are not required to have witnesses.
It can literally be just you and your partner.
District of Columbia
Washington, D.C.s laws around self-uniting marriage are similar to Colorados.
Anyone can self-solemnize without an officiant, and no witnesses are required.
Pennsylvania
In Pennsylvania, you do not need an officiant to get married regardless of your religion.
In fact, the clerks office should not ask you to prove your faith per state guidelines.
Whats the program Process?
Denver County started offering online marriage license program appointments early in the COVID-19 crisis.
We prioritized it, and at the end of the day, love prevailed.
Even during the pandemic.
The availability of online marriage system appointments varies from county to county, even within the same state.
Is Self-Solemnization More Expensive?
No, self-solemnizing is almost always less expensive than having a traditional marriage ceremony with an officiant present.
This is because you wont have to pay any fees or feel obligated to gift money to a third-party.
However, some counties will charge a slightly higher fee when you apply for a self-uniting marriage license.
This fee is nominal.
When you account for the money youre saving on officiant fees, you still come out on top.
Can Self-Uniting Wedding Be Remote?
It depends on where you live.
The District of Columbias law similarly requires no witnesses, allowing you to have a completely remote wedding.
California is unique in that it still requires two witnesses be present at your wedding ceremony per state law.
But it explicitly allows your witnesses to attend the wedding via online teleconferencing.
Prior to the pandemic, two witnesses were required to attend the ceremony in person.
Odds are, the validity of your marriage ceremony wont be challenged unless you decide to get divorced later.
Brynne Conroy is a contributor to The Penny Hoarder.
