Real Answers for Life’s Money Challenges
Me and my boyfriend are in our second year of college.
We moved into an on-campus apartment together last semester.
He went to visit his family for a few weeks.
I did the same, but since my job is close to my parents house, I kept working.
I told him to talk to his manager, but he still hasnt.
Your boyfriend has the luxury to make excuses because he has abackup plan.
That backup plan is you.
He knows that if he fails to deliver, youll find a way to carry both of you.
You brew coffee at home, you dont walk into Target and you refuse to order avocado toast.
(Can you sense my millennial sarcasm there?)
You know which ones were talking about: rent, utilities, cell phone bill, insurance, groceries…
I was in a relationship that sounds a lot like yours for over a decade.
What I learned is that its impossible to motivate someone else.
No matter how much you love the person, that leaves you drained mentally, emotionally, and financially.
What you could do isset boundaries.
Your boyfriend can stick it out at his current job.
(like dont feel sorry for him if hes not in love with his job after a week.)
Or he can look for a different job.
Let him figure this out like an adult.
Know someone whos been couch-dwelling a little too hard?
Help ease em into pulling their weight with any of these easy gigs.
The hard part about setting boundaries is that there have to be consequences when someone violates them.
So if your boyfriend refuses to work, it’s crucial that you seriously consider ending this relationship.
I get how difficult all this is, given that you want to build a future with your boyfriend.
But you oughta secure a future for yourself first.
That also means making time to enjoy your college years.
You clearly have a solid work ethic.
But your boyfriend sounds really immature.
Sometimes consequences force a person to grow up.
Whatever you do, prioritize your own needs over your boyfriends comfort.
He only gets to be part of your future if he proves hes worth it.
Robin Hartill is a certified financial planner and a senior writer at The Penny Hoarder.
