Real Answers for Life’s Money Challenges
My family constantly hustles my father for money.
They cry and tell him theyll pay him back, but never do.
He has a very small pension and Social Security.
Were talking hundreds to thousands at a time.
He always gives in, then gets irate when they wont pay him back.
This has happened over and over for many years.
He knows they never pay him back, but they manipulate him for more.
He gives in because he doesnt want to be alone.
Personally, I think he would be better off alone.
Who needs a family who manipulates you over and over again?
Sibling #3 is a con-artist.
She listed my father as the responsible financial party for her adult sons dental bill.
And he paid it!
Sibling #1 forged two personal checks for over $6,000.
She is a felon who stole over $300,000 from clients at her previous job.
This sibling resides with our father, too.
She has no job after prison, is on Medicaid, and seeking disability to avoid paying restitution.
Sibling #4 works full time.
He conned our father into paying his child support and is also married to a nurse.
She blew all of our grandparents money.
She even went into foreclosure a few years back.
Sibling #3 lives with her.
I am sibling #2.
Ive been married for 27 years and have two adult children, both college graduates.
Weve always managed our finances amongst ourselves.
Were the only ones who have never taken or asked my father for money.
I would honor his wishes, but wish to avoid any future issues with these family members.
Relationships in this family are broken and nonexistent with most.
My husband and I have tried to talk to my father about his anger over all the money.
We seem to be the ones he complains to.
He screams and swears at us, and we arent the problem.
So our calls and visits with him have decreased because of his behavior.
Ive explained he isnt helping them by giving in.
These people will never learn to dig themselves out of their own trouble.
They will always find some sucker to manipulate.
Keep in mind that even the worst relationships usually arent bad 100% of the time.
Reducing contact with your dad will only make him more vulnerable.
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Try talking to your dad when hes calm.
Tell him you hate seeing how upset he gets when family members take advantage of his kindness.
Ask him to talk about ways you might prevent this from happening again.
One relatively easy solution may be to convince your dad to freeze his credit.
Our team has compiled alist of creative waysyou can fatten your bank account this week.
This is a long list, so dont get overwhelmed.
Well keep it updated as offers changes or expire.
Suggest that your dad meet with an attorney to discuss ways to safeguard his money.
Your father may very well reject your suggestions.
That will be frustrating since youve seen the same patterns play out so many times.
If he starts screaming or swearing, tell him youre not having this discussion again.
Try steering the conversation to a neutral topic.
If he still resists, tell him youre hanging up the phone or cutting your visit short.
Say youll call back tomorrow after hes had time to calm down.
Set a firm boundary.
see to it your dad knows youre in his camp but also that you wont tolerate his verbal abuse.
Youre only willing to have this conversation if you’ve got the option to make it about solutions.
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