I think he opened this investment account while we were married.

How can I stop and make it fair?

My husband doesnt know that I know about his hidden investment.

A man has secret cash emerging from the bottom of a red couch he is sitting on while reading a newspaper. His wife is on a ladder cleaning their house.

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Do I consult first with a lawyer, or do I talk to my husband about his wrong action?

What steps do I have to take so that safeguard my finances?

-G.

Dear G.,

The answer depends on how much you trust your husband.

Dear Penny

Were you shocked to learn about this investment account?

Or does siphoning off investments into a secret account seem like par for the course with him?

If your husband is trustworthy and is open with you about financial matters, Id start with him.

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You dont need to approach this in full-blown confrontation mode.

Tell him what you found, and ask him to explain.

Another possibility would be that he simply forgot to update the beneficiary, which is actually quite common.

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Sure, he could be hiding money in his ex-wifes name.

But sometimes the simplest explanation is the correct one.

That wont get you out of having a difficult conversation with your husband, of course.

If you cant trust your spouse, Id seriously question whether you want to stay in this marriage.

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I cant tell you how to fairly divide assets among your husbands kids from the little information I have.

(Its not clear in your letter whether the other children are yours as well.)

But the two of you should meet with an estate planning attorney to review your beneficiary designations and wills.

The two of you should each know about the others assets and major expenses.

But you should ask your husband to go over any investment accounts and bank accounts each of you owns.

If your husband refuses, consider that a major red flag.

Robin Hartill is a certified financial planner and a senior writer at The Penny Hoarder.

Send your tricky money questions to[email protected]or chat with her inThe Penny Hoarder Community.

(Can you sense my millennial sarcasm there?)

You know which ones were talking about: rent, utilities, cell phone bill, insurance, groceries…